Waterstones website: Four-star Customer review
Wendy Miles
Okay, you've hit the magic number, so the last thing that you need is a tongue in cheek guide listing the virtues ( there are some you know) on reaching the "Middle Ages". Wrong, you do actually!. This is a wonderfully accuarte A-Z for those too young to be classed as confirmed Grumpy Old's but those clearly well on route through varying degrees of frequent Mildly Grumpy moments. The section on Compliments is particulary bitter sweet but is one of many painfully funny observations on life as a forty something.'
* 'A very funny book' - Leslie Joseph, The Vanessa Feltz Show, BBC Radio London.
* 'An amusing A to Z of the decade we're all supposed to fear, but that changes for each generation, very much in the Grumpy Old Men image' - The Bookseller Father's Day choice.
* 'The manual for misbehaving in your forties' - BBC Radio 4's Loose Ends.
* Now out in Icon Paperbacks, £7.99.
Things Not To Do In Your Forties: Number 1289
Dress inappropriately at rock festivals
Wearing fairy wings and a net dress with a pair of Doc Martens is not a good look for anyone over four. Ditto any item of clothing that makes you resemble half a sheep, unless you want to be mistaken for a Blue Peter presenter from 1983 who hasn’t been able to adjust. Give youth a chance to have its own nostalgia: you’re only young and trying not to sit on a filthy latrine and thinking it’s romantic once ...
You'll probably own at least ten fleeces by the time you're forty-five. They come in a variety of rich colours, and once you get over the rather loaded response that 'it looks nice and warm' from someone who wears other sorts of clothes, there's definitely no looking back ...
Is Jennifer Anniston at nearly forty a millionairess with a fabulous TV career and some decent films... or is she nearly forty with a series of failed relationships and no children? Only you know how jealous, bitter and twisted you're feeling today ...
It is expected that sooner or later the forties man will succumb to his 'inner sausage pricker' and purchase a barbecue. He is simply answering a call that lies deep in the male psyche to have a burning pyre in his own back garden and to wear a plastic bra and panties apron ...
Just as reason separates us from the animals so horror at having parts of our body stapled with bits of metal and taking several hours to pass through airport security separates us from youth. If under any circumstances you still feel tempted, remind yourself to hang on in there as there's always your first hip replacement to look forward to ...
It's a moot point whether you can still claim to have a 'boyfriend' at your advanced age. 'Mum's boyfriend' does sound a tad Jacqueline Wilson as if you'll always be accompanied by a long list of problems and a live-in social worker ...
Today's fortysomethings have never had it so good - or so confusing. While our parents could look forward to a sensible middle age we're more likely to be playing our Morrissey records and thanking God for the White Stripes and that Jonathan Ross is on Radio 2.
For anyone forty and fabulous, or who's forty and owns ten fleeces,or who just wants to let a fortysomething relative, friend or colleague feel even worse, Forty-fied: How to be a Fortysomething is an A - Z guide that leaves no embarrassing scenario unturned.
'Very funny, but very scary' - BBC Radio London
'A tongue-in-cheek guide for those of us who, thanks to longer life expectancy and the spread of no-brow culture, find ourselves stranded between youth and middle-age' - Mark Sanderson, Sunday Telegraph
'How to be a fortysomething in the 21st century: a guide for the perplexed. What does it mean to be 40 in 2007? A new book helps Generation Confused negotiate the tricky ground of middle youth' - The Scotsman
'How to hit 40 - and get away with it. How to handle the most confusing decade, presented in a handy A - Z guide.' The Daily Record
'At an age when our parents were striving to pull off that wisdom thing, 21st century 40-something dude is still fondling his Morrissey collection, ogling fast cars (driven, sadly, by Jeremy Clarkson) and listening to cool sounds on the radio (played, sadder still, by Jonathan Ross on Radio 2, which is, of course, the new Radio 1). Meanwhile, 21st century 40-something bird is contemplating procreation' - The Sunday Herald
'A wry new book on what it's like to be a fortysomething ... his observations about the absurdity of life are cloaked in humour' - East Anglian Daily Times
'The definitive guide to being in your forties.' - BBC Radio Mersey
The Bookseller Christmas Humour preview selection (July 2007) - ' ... the best humour titles from the publishers' lists.'
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